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Ancient Skeleton Found Frozen In Ice Reportedly On Hold With Centrelink

21 February 2017
SBS comedy

Local authorities were shocked to discover that a pile of ancient human remains found in a shelf of ice and recovered today belong to an early human believed to have died while on hold to Centrelink, a call that remains on hold to this very day.
Those investigating the incident have claimed that they were surprised by the discovery:
“We knew wait times were bad,” one insider told The Backburner. “But this fella has been frozen for hundreds of years. Frankly, even if he has his debts sorted out his phone bill is going to be an absolute mess.

'Please find attached amount owing - Merry Christmas!' Woman's cheeky response after Centrelink demands she repay a TWO CENT debt

15 December 2016
Daily Mail Australia

A woman has received a debt recovery letter from Centrelink telling her she's been overpaid and had to return the money.
But rather than a massive bill, the government agency was chasing Kerry King from Rowville, Victoria, for two cents.
So she paid up - by sending Centrelink a two cent coin.

Centrelink's Shithouse Debt Recovery System Is *STILL* Fucking People Over

28 December 2016
Pedestrian Daily

Centrelink's joint data-matching program with the ATO has so far done a wonderful job, if the area it was designed to perform in was falsely accusing people of accruing massive debts some time in the last decade. Just in case that's not clear: it was not designed to do that (as far as we're aware), and is, in fact, horrible.

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